Baby #2

>> Friday, January 15, 2010

Before you go jumping up and down about my announcement.....know that there is no announcement. No I am not pregnant, but I swear I am starting to wish I was. I have had FIVE people tell me in the past month about their upcoming pregnancies or their decisions to start a family. It is really putting a a bug in my ear. And I am envious...so envious!

But I don't know why?

When we had Lily I never ruled out another baby. Even after the miserably pregnancy and the sheer force it took me to just be mobile. For the months following her arrival I would reach down and touch my empty (although soft) belly and long for her to be there again. I would remind myself how my pregnancy was not an easy one, but to no avail. I swear sometimes I would feel a phantom baby move in me.

People would ask: When are you having another one? And my responses were "not until she is out of diapers! I cannot handle two in diapers!" or "we want a big family trip with Lily before I get pregnant again" or "when we can get the money worked out, aka a job that can afford two daycare payments" I always had an answer.

Now although those reasons still apply they just don't seem to matter as much. I look at Lily and she gives me a sly smile and a "I lub yyyeeewwwww" and I forget how hard it is to be up nursing in the middle of the night or to keep up with a running toddler. I forget how I cried for a month dropping her off at daycare as a newborn, or the lack of confidence you have that first year. It all melts away.

Then she smacks me in the face, and alas I am back in reality.......

2 comments:

Trish January 15, 2010 at 1:44 PM  

I hope you guys make the "right" decission for you...and just have fun "tryin" hehehehe!!!!

Trish January 18, 2010 at 8:59 AM  

oh, I have an awrd for you over on my blog :O)